Brutal Words
by ILETUDRIVE
Summary: An alternative ending for the fire that bored Port Charles last February. It's complete with a better summary inside. Why not give it a try?


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Explanation: This is just one alternative ending for a few characters concerning the hugely unsatisfying Port Charles fire story line. It features Jason, Elizabeth, Carly, Courtney, and Zander with cameos by Bobbie, Brian and Lorenzo. I hope you are entertained, there was one section I loved. Anyway it's an idea that's been nagging me so I wrote it out so it would stop. It's complete so why not give it a try?

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the right to complain.

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Feedback: Is the only payment I receive so let me know if you hate it or like it, or anywhere in between either here, or **stephanie22304@yahoo.com**

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Distribution: Ask me first please.

Steph

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Brutal Words

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~General Hospital~

"Here we are again. Alone in this bright room that has the lingering smell of medicine in it. I've finally realized why people always bring the injured or the sick flowers. It's not for the person who is ill it's for them. They bring the flowers to mask the smell of the sick, the medicine, and it works, or at least it works for a while. But eventually the sweet flower smell fades and your left with the bitter smell of medicine and all you want to do is leave its nauseating aroma."

__

She was back. That meant another day had passed. How was it he never was aware of time passing but once he heard her voice he knew he'd spent another day in hell? The fact he wasn't aware of his immobility every minute of every day should have reassured him, instead it made him furious. The realization that he'd lost more time, as much as a day angered him, no it destroyed him. He prided himself on his body, his control. He wasn't vain about it but he still prided himself on it, and now he'd lost that, he'd lost control over his own body.

"I realize you probably want to leave too. As much as you hate hospitals I know you would crawl out of here if you could. That's one of the reasons I always move the flowers into the bathroom when I visit. I figure sooner or later you'll get tired of smelling the medicine, hearing the hospital sounds, and you'll wake up and want out of that bed."

__

If he could've he would have smiled at her words. If he could've he would have proved her words right and walked out of the hospital room that minute … if he could've.

"So what do you want to talk about today?" She paused. "We covered the latest in my life yesterday. I'm gradually filling my new apartment and my new job at the E Street Galleryis going well. I really like being around art again even if its not my own. Although, I am beginning to sketch again, I even tried to put paint on a canvas last night. I need some more canvases stretched, do you know anyone who can help me with that?"

__

There was a pause as if she were waiting for a response. He would love to give her one.

"I guess I'll get it done eventually, I just hope I don't get another splinter. It felt weird to be painting again after such a long layoff. At times it felt like I'd never held a brush before, but gradually the feeling came back. It was like a feeling of rightness. Finally I was back doing something I love. I'll never be an artist who will change the world with my interpretation of life but I don't need to. I draw, paint, not for other people or for accolades but because I need to do it. Did you know there was a time last year I was preparing for an art show? Ric had promised…"

__

The pause was back and this time it went on, it gave him time to recognize the pain in her voice. As he had for years he couldn't help responding to her pain only this time he couldn't do anything to help her. She used to always thank him for things and he'd always dismissed it with words like he hadn't done anything. Now he knew what those words really meant. He really couldn't do anything to help her. Help her? Hell he couldn't do anything to help himself.

"No I imagine you didn't know about my supposed art show. I say supposed, because it, like a bunch of other promises Ric made me, never happened. This is the part where you say I told you so. Of course you'd need to be able to speak and also morph into another person because you'd never say those words to anyone, especially not me. No not you … not_ Mr. It's Your Life Do Whatever Makes you Happy. Mr. I'll Never Give You Guidance as to What I Really Feel or Think Because that Might Influence Your Choices in Life and God Knows I Can't Let That Happen."_

__

When she'd begun speaking he'd felt bad for her and the pain she had in her voice as she remembered Ric's lies. But that feeling changed as she went on with her diatribe, because that was rapidly what it was being turned into. It was almost as if she were trying to pick a fight with him which made no sense. She had no right making fun of his beliefs either.

"I have a vague memory from my Freshman Government class of a system of government called Laissez-Faire which basically means hands off. The phrase definitely applies to you Mr. Laissez-Faire. _Mr. Can't Voice an Opinion or Be Drawn Into Making or Helping Make Decisions for Another."_

__

She was definitely trying to pick a fight.

"I guess you had to be Mr. Laissez-Faire if you wanted to be in Sonny and Carly's life. Those two are two of the most self-destructive people on the planet. If you got involved in their plans or tried to talk them out of it you wouldn't be able to do the one thing you think you're allowed to do … which is to fix their messes. You're not an enforcer Jason you're a cleaner upper. I ought to make you a cute little uniform so your leather jacket won't get dirty."

__

Again the anger coursed through his immobile form, he wanted to clench his fists, he tried to clench his fists, and couldn't. But that didn't stem the anger she had no right to say these things to him, even if she didn't know he could hear her. Had she never realized her words could hurt? That they especially had the power to hurt him. She'd used them as weapons on him for years now. Getting shot was cleaner, less painful somehow, then when Elizabeth ripped his skin off and stuck darts in his heart with a few choice words.

"Do you know why Sonny and Carly get away with everything they do to others, to themselves, to each other? They get away with it because of you Jason. You always clean up after them when they make a mess. You always shield them no matter what the cost. You exist to take care of them and they know that. Hell they count on that. There may have been a time when this wasn't the case, but how many years ago was that? How many times have you been summoned, expected to help, told what to do? You do what they want and what do you get out of it? Their undying gratitude? I think not. All you get is a kick in the ass when the crisis is over and the promise that they'll be calling again soon."

__

Elizabeth's words were brutal. But they had a ring of truth in them just like all her pointed accusations did. She saw too much when it came to him. Why was it he was the one man in her life she didn't blind herself to? When Lucky had returned she had lied to herself, to everyone that everything was still perfect between the two of them. That it was as perfect as it had been in 1999 before the fire happened. She had twisted herself into a pretzel trying to live up to that love, the memory of that love, a love that seemed to no longer exist. She'd been trying to please Lucky and everyone else. She had been so desperate not to lose, not to be alone, not to admit that the love that Lucky and her had once shared had perished in a fire even if the boy hadn't.

She had to turn a blind eye to all of Lucky's problems, her own misery, all in a desperate attempt to believe the lies she was busy telling herself. His return had brought reality into her world. He'd helped her remove some of those blinders, but then he'd had to leave. What would have happened between them if he hadn't had to protect Sonny, Carly and Michael? Could everything that happened next have been avoided? He never looked back, but lying in a bed he couldn't get out of, hearing her voice, remembering that time, he couldn't help but look back and regret. He never understood the concept of grieving for something that might have been. He'd seen Sonny do it, even Carly do it but that didn't mean he understood it. Not until now when he thought about that moment when she hadn't taken his hand in the park.

"Do you have cards that you give out to people? You know the ones I mean in case of crisis call Jason he'll swoop in and rescue you. If you do have them you need to make sure you put in some fine print at the bottom warning people not to hang on too tight, because Super Jason never stays around long. It's true you know, you never do stay around, no matter who asks you to stay you always leave."

__

This time her words didn't make him angry, the weariness in her voice made him sad. Again her words had cut to his heart and the sting he felt was due to the truth in them. Why did she see so much about him? Why couldn't she do the same with others? Zander was someone he still had difficulty understanding. He knew they'd gone through a life and death situation together, but that didn't really explain sleeping with him. He'd once gone through a life and death situation with Brenda when the jet they were riding on crashed, but he hadn't wanted to sleep with her. Strangle her definitely, especially when she'd go on and on about fairy tales, but sleeping with her had never crossed his mind. Elizabeth had slept with Zander even gotten involved with him for a time. She couldn't see that what Zander was doing had been calculated to hurt him, to hurt Sonny. It had taken weeks for her to realize the truth about Zander and now since she'd admitted that Zander was the father of her child, not Ric, he had to wonder if she ever had.

Ric. He was another man she blinded and bound herself too, and Ric was more dangerous to her than Lucky or Zander could ever hope of being. Rich was a game player, a manipulator who didn't care who he used or who he hurt as long as he achieved his goal. And his goal remained the same as it was since he'd hit town … punishing Sonny and the people Sonny cared about. He was a user pure and simple and Jason hated the fact he was able to continually hurt and use Elizabeth's feelings to hurt her. He knew her, he knew she had blinded herself to the bad in Ric because she was desperate not to be alone, not to be left the way she'd been so many times in the past. But even though he knew why she was doing it, didn't mean he liked it.

"I guess that isn't fair."

__

Her hand took his encasing it in her warmth. He wanted to clutch it in a return but his fingers remained limp in her hands.

"You're there when Sonny and Carly need you, your there most of the times Emily needs you as well. But are you around when there isn't a crisis to solve? Sometimes I think you believe the only time you matter, the only time you're important is when your fixing one of Sonny or Carly's messes. Somehow I could never find the right words to convince you that your important even if all you're doing is eating one of those awful #4 sandwiches you like so much."

__

She'd done it again. For all her devotion to men who didn't deserve it, devotion that went on far too long to be considered healthy, she never did that with him. She always saw past the wall he used to keep people out. She looked past the image of a mob enforcer to the man inside. At one time Robin had been able to do that, she'd been able to look past his anger to the man he was coming to be. But eventually he had turned into a man she didn't want to know and she had begun to blind herself to the "bad parts" in him. Elizabeth never did that. She saw him for who he was, both the good and the bad, and more importantly she had accepted him in spite of the bad.

At least she'd accepted him until he'd surprised her in a way she'd never thought he would. The one thing she'd expected from him was for him not to lie or deliberately hurt her the way so many other people had done to her. And that's exactly what he had done. Even worse he'd done it when he hadn't had too. From the very beginning she'd instinctively known there were some things that she couldn't ask about, some things she couldn't know and she'd accepted that. She hadn't tried to change his mind or change him the way Robin had or demand to know everything like Carly, she'd just let things drop and accepted what he did tell her. Years earlier he'd warned her that being in his life meant bodyguards, comments from the police, and she hadn't even blinked. She'd just agreed to do anything to keep him in her life. At that time they had only be friends, maybe friends with a hint of more, but friends nevertheless. But all that had changed, it had changed the night she found out he'd chosen to lie to her instead of saying I can't tell you what's going on but trust me. The time he'd deliberately hurt her instead of protecting her the way he'd always tried to.

What had she called him? A coward? Sonny's boy first, last, and always, or something like that. He'd proven her wrong, he'd proven he was more than that. All it had taken was turning his back on over 3 years of friendship, of caring, and then bedding and wedding Sonny's sister. Sonny's sister. By rights he should say his wife, but had she ever really been his wife? His injuries had made him immobile that immobility made it so he couldn't out run his thoughts any longer. Wasn't it true that his choice to marry Courtney had been prompted by her and Carly? Wasn't it true that his starting things with Courtney in the first place had been an attempt to drown out Elizabeth's voice, to banish the words from his mind, his memory? Even now though Elizabeth had never said the words to him he could hear her thinking. "Marrying Courtney had been the closest he could get to Sonny." But that wasn't the reason. Had that been his motivation he would have married Robin. Robin and Sonny had been closer then Sonny and Courtney ever would be.

"Why do you always run when things get hard Jason? The first time you left it was because you couldn't handle Sonny and Carly sleeping together. The second time again it was because of Sonny, some crisis only you could handle." There was a hesitation and her voice softened. "Sometimes, in my more delusional moments I think I played a role in your leaving as well. I think our feelings for each other were changing even back then. Had there been no Lucky maybe that wouldn't have been merely a visit for you, maybe it would have been a homecoming."

__

A heavy sigh and a squeeze of the hand she still held changed the tone in the room again.

"But there was a Lucky wasn't there? I have no delusions about the last time you left. That time I know you ran because of me. Because I couldn't handle the fact that I had feelings for you and Lucky at the same time. It was the only time since I'd known you that you pushed me. The only time you pressured me. You had to know what I'd say that day in the park when you asked me to run away with you. You knew what my answer had to be because you knew me better than I knew myself. How could I, Elizabeth the worrier, the needy, risk everything, give up everyone and leave town with you? You knew when you asked me that I'd say no. I saw that knowledge in your eyes. You boxed me in that day so you could do the one thing you wanted to do all along which was run."

__

That wasn't true. He'd left because of the bomb that had been sent to Sonny, not because he was running away from her. That was the reason … wasn't it? He wasn't the one that always ran away that was her. … So why did her words have a ring of truth to them? He tried to shake his head, shake her words away, but his head didn't move, so he was stuck in trying to point out the lie in her reasoning, to himself alone. Every time that visit she'd open up to him, pull him close, then get spooked and run away from him, run away from the feelings that were growing between them. She'd run away from him back to the safety of a love that had long been forgotten. In this case her accusation was wrong, he wasn't a runner she was.

"I have to know why? Why didn't you run this time Jason? Things were getting intense that's your cue to leave. If you had you wouldn't be in a coma, you wouldn't be lying in this hospital bed. Why … ooooh," she broke off on a gasp. "That was a hard one, here feel."

__

Jason was confused by her words, his hand was moved until it was pressed against soft fabric. Beneath his hand he could feel heat, something solid, and suddenly there was a jab against his fingers.

"That was another hard one. Either the baby is going to be a field goal kicker or a striker."

__

The baby, her baby was kicking that's what he was feeling. Her laugh washed over him, but it was the feel of the new life moving under his hand that amazed him. The first baby he'd felt kick was Lois' then there was Michael, and finally Morgan, yet he still had the same sense of wonder he'd had that first time he'd felt the strange sensation. His attention was soon distracted by something else, a dampness on his hand. It was her tears, even though he couldn't see he still recognized them.

"If you had run, my baby wouldn't be here right now. I wouldn't be here now trying to pick a fight with you, trying to make you mad enough that you'll wake up from this coma. It's been weeks since the fire Jason, it's time for you to come back into the land of the living … please."

__

When her voice broke, his heart broke and he tried, with everything in him he tried to give her the sign she desperately asked for with every visit. A sign that he was still in his body fighting to wake up.

"I guess you're not ready yet." 

__

She finally spoke after a long time and he could hear the disappointment that coated her voice.

"You have a few more months. But I expect you to be awake when I name you as Godfather to my little girl … oops I didn't want anyone to know. Unfortunately you're not in the position to tell anyone, but I wouldn't mind if you did. I'm having a little girl and I'm having her thanks to you. If you hadn't gotten me out of the hotel when you did there wouldn't be any little girl. Of course its also because of me that you went back into the hotel, and because of that you were struck by the beam when it broke right after you handed me off to Lucky. Don't you see you've made it impossible for me to ever get mad at you? How can I get mad at you for risking your life when it's because of that fact my baby will live, I lived."

__

Her tears continued to fall on his hand and he was powerless to reassure her that it didn't matter what happened to him as long as she was okay. He'd told her once he couldn't hold her in his arms and watch her bleed. He could never let her be hurt if he could help it. He'd been watching the hotel burn safe in the knowledge that the people he cared about, the people he loved had made it out safely. A window on the 4th floor had suddenly shattered and the outline of a woman appeared. He'd known it was Elizabeth even before she'd screamed for help.

His reaction had been immediate brushing past the police, the firemen, he'd ran for the entrance. Courtney followed him pulling on his hand begging him to stop, but he'd brushed her off without a thought and ran into the fiery building. In that moment he knew he'd die if it meant saving Elizabeth. The moment of truth, the moment of clarity came when he stared down a wall of flames separating him from a woman he'd been falling in love with for years. A woman he still loved.

"I still can't understand why I came through the fire with a few bruises and minor smoke inhalation yet you're lying in a bed in a place you hate even more than jail."

__

He could hear the guilt and again cursed himself for not being able to reassure her. She had no reason to feel guilty. He'd been where she was, sitting by her bed waiting for her to wakeup. That was a place he never wanted to be ever again.

"We hadn't even spoken in months. I thought it was my turn to die. Then suddenly you were there. By that point I couldn't see, I could barely breathe, then I felt hands on me, hands I knew were yours and I knew I was going to be okay, my baby was going to be okay. And I am, I guess, at least to a point. I'll never be fully okay until you wake up."

"I want our friendship back Jason, but I don't want to go back to the way things were between us last year. I want to be your friend. I hope you'll want to be mine. I didn't like the person I became last year, the one who clung to Ric even when I realized I never knew him. I'll never return to the Elizabeth of old, but I kind of like the Elizabeth of today, I think you might too. I'll even stop fighting with your wif…with Courtney. That ought to show my sincerity."

__

Her words triggered a chord in him. He didn't like the person he'd become last year either. He had to wake up, he had to regain control of his life and he would as soon as he could master his body. He hated feeling weak. He had ever since he'd woken up in the hospital that first time. But this time it was worse, this time he knew who he was, he knew whom he cared about, he knew who he missed and more importantly who missed him. Elizabeth, Carly, Emily, even Sonny was acting more like the friend he'd once been instead of the demanding ruler of the last few years. He felt Elizabeth tense, and then heard another voice, one that sounded vaguely familiar but one he couldn't place, and he felt a ball of tension form in his stomach. He knew what the other voice meant. It meant it was her signal to leave. He didn't want her to go.

"I suppose I should get going," Elizabeth murmured.

__

Already his hand had been placed back on the bed and he heard her get up from her chair. Desperate to stop her he concentrated all of his focus on trying to move.

"I'll see you later."

__

The words were whispered in his ear, and he knew from her other visits what would happen next. Please let it work this time, he begged a God he didn't always believe in. Her lips touched his briefly and he tried to respond.

"Jason?"

__

He could hear the hesitancy, the confusion in her voice and hoped that meant she'd felt the movement. That he had finally been able to move. His wait went on forever, he felt her hand on his face tracing his lips as if she were trying to puzzle something out. If he could open his eyes he knew he'd find her biting her bottom lip.

"I guess it was just wishful thinking." She sighed loudly. "Tomorrow it will be reality. Tomorrow will be the day you wake up. Do you hear me Jason, tomorrow I want your eyes to look at me with recognition."

__

She was leaving. She hadn't felt him move, he hadn't been able to move, he still couldn't control his body. Why couldn't he find his way back? He wanted so desperately to be back with her, with his family. His moan was soft, yet surprising and it was music to his ears. He'd made a sound and that was a first. He'd be out of this bed soon. And when he was, the first person he wanted to see was the one that had just left.

~*~*~

Elizabeth remained outside his door for a few minutes trying to regroup. It was hard seeing him like that. He was such a strong man, even when he'd been shot he'd still had some of his strength, but seeing him lying in the bed like that, unable to move, unable to fight his way out of the coma was hard to watch, hard to believe. She knew he was fighting his way back, a part of her even thought he could hear her when she spoke. As long as he fought so would she, sooner or later he'd wake up and she would be there for him when he did.

"I'm sorry I couldn't give you more time Elizabeth."

The familiar voice made Elizabeth move and she smiled at her former boss. "It's okay Bobbie, I appreciate the warning, the last thing Jason needs is me and Courtney arguing at his bedside."

"I figured as much," the redheaded nurse fell into step beside her. "How are you doing?"

"Good. I really like my job."

"I didn't think you'd miss Kelly's although most of the people there miss you."

"I'd been there long enough, too long if you ask me," Elizabeth answered honestly, she didn't know any other person her age who still worked at the same job they had when they were 15. Her focus shifted to the end of the hall and the blonde standing by the nurse's station. As usual Courtney wasn't alone. Her ever-present "friend" was with her. In spite of her vow of a few minutes ago, she felt herself getting mad.

"How are things going with the divorce?" Bobbie asked. "Is Ric still fighting it, trying to get you back?"

"He's not happy," she admitted. "Alexis has backed him off, he'll sign the papers, he doesn't have a choice." That was true she had threatened to go to the public, the news with everything he'd done to her, to Carly since he'd come to town, unless he signed the papers. She knew his job, as D.A. was important to him, it was vital to him if he wanted to continue his vendetta against Sonny. He hadn't signed the papers yet but Elizabeth knew it was only a matter of time, and a part of her felt sad over that fact.

"He isn't going to try to get custody is he?"

"He couldn't even if he wanted to," Elizabeth replied carefully her eyes on the nurse's station. Carly had joined Courtney and she knew they were close enough to hear her conversation with Bobbie if they chose to listen. It was time, actually it was past time, it was time to end the final hold Ric had on her and repay a debt to a friend at the same time. "Ric isn't the father of my baby … Zander is."

She could tell her words had an impact not only on Bobbie but the women at the nurse's station that had turned to look. Elizabeth met their gaze head on. She wasn't going to hide anymore, she wasn't going to bury her head in the sand again. This was reality and reality was what she wanted.

"I didn't realize you were still close with Zander," Bobbie recovered first. "With everything that went on with Emily and then the shooting…"

"Zander didn't shoot that police officer," she raised her voice. "The cop was lying more than likely to frame Zander or to protect the real shooter." The cop in question glared at her while Courtney suddenly appeared very nervous. "Zander wasn't a killer, he didn't have it in him."

Bobbie looked like she wanted to disagree then finally nodded. "I need to get back to work. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye Bobbie," Elizabeth worked up a smile but remained where she was. She knew there would be questions asked of her, and she was ready to answer them. Ric would be furious that she'd told people about the baby. Maybe it would get through to him that there would be no forgiveness from her this time.

It would be easier if she could hate Ric. But she couldn't probably never would. Ric was so damaged, she'd seen that all along, and thought she could help him, help him let go of his vendetta against Sonny. She'd needed to be the one to help him, to get him to let go of his hatred. But she couldn't help Ric if he didn't want to change. He was so wrapped up in his vendetta, in his hatred for Sonny that anyone in his life would remain second to the need to hurt Sonny. She knew he'd tried, but he wasn't willing to give up his hatred, until he could Ric would never be truly happy, he would never heal. But that wasn't her problem anymore. He wasn't her problem anymore.

"I hear congratulations are in order."

Bracing herself Elizabeth turned to face Carly, wondering if this would be the time that Carly finally yelled at her because of Jason's injury. She'd been waiting for an explosion from the former blonde since the night of the fire but none came. She was beginning to believe that Carly didn't blame her, and if that was true there was no way she could keep on blaming herself. "Congratulations on what?"

"You finally divorcing that sleaze ball Ric," Carly replied.

Nodding Elizabeth faced the woman her soon to be ex-husband had hurt almost as badly as her. "Not soon enough I'm afraid."

"That's true. You should have never gotten back with him after he kidnapped me."

Silently cursing her hormones when she felt the sudden urge to cry she waited to answer until the need passed. There would be no tears in front of Carly, and especially not in front of Courtney. "I've made mistakes, just like you have. I can apologize again, but I don't think you'd believe me. I can't explain to you why I did what I did, I'm having problems explaining it to myself."

"Earlier you said Zander was the father of your baby, is that true?"

"Yes," Elizabeth waited. Carly turned away for a long time and when she finally turned back to her, she was surprised to see a hint of tears in Carly's brown eyes.

"There was a time when Zander was my friend. I've never had very many friends and I didn't take care of that friendship so I lost him. I lost him because of some stupid stuff I did," Carly's voice was rough with emotion. "But there's one thing I know. He would have made a great dad."

"I know," Elizabeth agreed and the two foes shared possibly the first easy moment between them since they realized they had Jason in common.

An angry Courtney spoke from behind Carly. "What did you say to make her so upset? 

"It's nothing Courtney," Carly snapped sharply.

"What are you doing here Elizabeth?"

"I'm standing," Elizabeth informed her coolly.

Incensed Courtney moved closer. "You stay the hell away from my husband."

"You're husband?" Elizabeth asked doubtfully. "Before the fire you'd been separated for weeks, divorce papers had been drawn up, you even began dating another man," she gestured to the cop who had accused Zander of attempted murder. "A cop no less, are you sure Jason even considers you his wife?"

"You stay away from Jason," Courtney hissed. "It's your fault he's here at all. It's you're fault he's in a coma."

Elizabeth flinched. It was the first time someone had spoken the accusation aloud and it hurt. Thinking it was one thing, but hearing it being said, was heartbreaking.

"That's enough Courtney," Carly grabbed her sister-in-law's arm and dragged her away from a rapidly paling Elizabeth. She shot a warning glare at the cop when he tried to follow. "Let's get something straight. It's not Elizabeth's fault Jason's in a coma. The reason he's in a coma is because he was trapped in a fire."

"The only reason he was in the fire was because of her," Courtney accused.

"So?" Carly demanded then went on with a roll of her eyes, had Courtney always sounded so strident? "Jason would never let anything happen to Elizabeth. He wouldn't be able to handle it if she was hurt and he could have helped her. You don't know their history." She didn't want to know their history but the memories remained in spite of her best efforts to exorcise them.

"Jason told me…"

"Jason told you as little as possible and probably only what you wanted to hear," Carly interrupted her whine.

"He's dying because of her."

Reacting instinctively Carly slapped Courtney hard across the face. "He is not dying," her menacing glare kept the cop at bay. "I know he's not dying, Sonny knows he's not dying, Elizabeth even knows it, the only person who believes he's dying, the only person acting like he's already dead Courtney is you."

"That's not true."

Carly had finally had enough it was time for some brutal truths, and if there was one thing she knew how to be it was brutal. "Are you afraid what will happen when he wakes up?" Courtney darted a look at the cop and she had her answer. That one second glance killed everything she'd ever felt for the girl. "I'll put you out of your misery and tell you what will happen when Jason wakes up. The divorce will go through and his mistake will finally be rectified."

"Our marriage wasn't a mistake," Courtney wailed.

"Do you want to know why he married you? It was because I told him that was the logical next step. I told him it was a good idea and he listened to me, but now I wonder if he wasn't trying to prove something to himself, or her," she gestured to where Elizabeth was sitting, "but one thing I know is he didn't marry you because of some deep abiding love he had for you."

"Why are you saying all these hurtful things?" Courtney's tears began to fall.

"Because I'm tired of pretending, I'm tired of the way you treated Jason, I'm tired of the way you disrespect my husband, and yours. Sure you come and visit Jason every day and stay what? 10 minutes top? Your always wiping your eyes when you leave, but magically a smile appears on your face when you walk in the waiting room and see your cop waiting," Carly moved closer to deliver her next set of cutting words. "A cop you once claimed you shot because he was going to shoot Jason. A claim that ended up costing Zander his life, you stupid bitch."

Paling Courtney turned to walk away but Carly was having none of that. Elizabeth's belief in Zander even after the things he'd done to her, had reminded her of the friendship Zander and her once had. A friendship that had kept her sane for a time, a friendship she had destroyed by her lies. She hadn't been able to help him when he was alive but she was going to explain a few things to the woman who had caused his death.

"Do you want to know why I pushed Jason at you?" Carly waited until Courtney looked at her, waited for her teary eyes to meet her dry, angry ones. "It's because I knew he would never be able to love you more than he loved me. That you would always come in second behind me, Sonny, and our kids." 

When Courtney flinched Carly smiled smugly. "You were the only woman I ever considered safe for Jason to be around. I sure couldn't let him stay with Elizabeth, she meant too much to him. She would have taken my place in his life, I didn't want that to happen, so you were the perfect solution. When Elizabeth and Jason had trouble I nudged him in your direction. I figured I could put up with you and your interference a lot easier than Elizabeth's I see now I misjudged both her and you."

"Carly stop it, we're friends. Don't lie like this," Courtney snapped.

Carly laughed loudly, almost cruelly. "Didn't you get the memo? I don't have friends, well none except for Jason. He's my best friend, he means more to me than anyone, except for Sonny and my kids. Did you really think I'd let you just keep hurting him? Bringing your cop lover to his bedside while he's in a coma? You're nobody to me Courtney. I don't care if you claim to be Sonny's sister, it doesn't matter, blood doesn't mean a damn thing to me or Sonny when it comes to family."

"That's enough Carly," Brian tried to step between the women.

"Back off officer," Lorenzo Alcazar appeared from out of nowhere. "Carly wasn't finished."

"I'm almost finished with her," Carly's focus returned to the blonde. "When Jason wakes up I'll be sure to tell him about your behavior while he was in the coma. He'll listen and he'll believe me, because he always knows when someone lies to him. I made a mistake about you Courtney, I can admit it, but I sure as hell don't have to live with it, or with you. Go with your cop or even better go back to AJ you two deserve each other." She caught Courtney's arm mid-motion avoiding the blonde's slap. "Don't go near Jason again. You don't want me as your enemy little girl, you don't have the first clue of what I'm capable of."

~*~*~

Elizabeth watched the confrontation with a great deal of interest. Her only wish was that they would speak louder so she could hear what was being said. It looked like Carly had finally had enough of Courtney's behavior, of her lies. She was surprised it took Carly so long to reach that point. If there was one thing she thought she could count on it was Carly's hatred for any woman who made the mistake of going near Jason. 

It appeared that Carly had won the battle, Courtney and her new boyfriend were leaving, spying the tears on the blonde's face Elizabeth could only shake her head. Never let a foe see you were hurt or afraid, especially not when it was Carly you were jousting with. Her attention shifted to the man beside Courtney and her suspicion continued to grow over the identity of his real shooter. It seemed like Zander was right.

__

"The body found in the basement of the Port Charles Hotel after last week' fire has been confirmed to be that of Zander Smith. Smith was a fugitive at the time of his death and was wanted in the connection with the shooting of a police officer."

Stunned Elizabeth turned off the TV and sank into her Grandmother's couch. She'd been afraid when she'd heard about the unidentified male body found in the hotel, that it had been Zander, but she'd prayed he'd gotten away before the fire started he'd had more than enough time to get out. 

She could still remember how stunned she had felt that night. She knew Ric had been lying to her again and for once she wasn't willing to let him get away with it. She had followed Ric to the hotel and into the basement when he'd disappeared inside a room, she'd waited for him to come out. When he finally did, he locked the door behind him and hid the key. Instinct made her stay hidden and once he was gone she retrieved the key and unlocked the door. She didn't know who was more stunned her or Zander.

Zander had been shackled to a huge steam pipe, shackled there by her husband no doubt. He had bruises on his face, which had probably come from Ric as well. His eyes when he saw her had went from anger to sadness in the time it took for her to blink. In that moment, looking into those eyes, she realized, she finally realized how out of control she'd let herself become. How far under Ric's control she had succumbed. The first step across the room had been one of the hardest she'd ever taken, but the ones after that were easier. She'd freed him and told him to run, she'd even offered him money. 

Since the fire she'd been clinging to a hope that Zander had listened to her and had run, that he'd gotten away before the fire, but now she knew he was dead. The tears fell softly for a man who had so much potential yet always doubted he was worthy of being loved. "You would have liked him little one," she held a hand to her stomach. "You would have loved your daddy." 

"Do you mean that?"

Startled Elizabeth shot off the couch, blinking furiously trying to clear the tears from her eyes. "Zander?"

"Yeah it's me."

"I thought," she gestured to the TV. "They said you were dead." Somehow that didn't matter what mattered was he was still alive. In that instant the harsh words, the fears, the guilt vanished and she crossed to him, to embrace him. "I don't care why you're here, I'm just glad you are." It took a minute but his arms finally came around her and hugged her back.

"Do you really mean that?" Zander pulled away to search her face. "Did you mean what you said earlier?"

"Yes I mean it, and I meant what I said to our little girl." She smiled at his stunned expression. "They did an ultrasound on me the night of the fire, I found out I'm having a girl, I haven't told anyone. But you deserve to know."

"W-what," he cleared his throat. "What about Ric?"

"Ric isn't a factor anymore. We're divorcing and there will be no reconciliation this time," she promised and meant every word she said. Her marriage was over, maybe it should have never happened in the first place, but she couldn't bring herself to regret it. Maybe she would one day, but for now she was just grieving for the loss of it, for her failure.

"I hope you mean that," he moved a step away. "If you ever start thinking about wanting to take him back there's something you need to know."

She wouldn't take Ric back but could tell that it was important for Zander to tell her what he knew. "What?"

"Ric was working with that cop Brian, the one who said I shot him. They were trying to bring Sonny and Jason down and didn't care who got hurt in the process."

Closing her eyes she sank weakly back on the couch. Again Ric's vendetta had caused someone else pain. "I knew you didn't shoot him, it's hard to believe that Ric could hate so much that he was willing to frame you for attempted murder. I'm sorry Zander."

"I don't know if that's what Ric planned on from the beginning but he did try to at the end."

"If not Ric then who?" Puzzled she looked over at him in time to notice how slowly and carefully he was walking. He was in pain, but wouldn't admit it, she pretended she didn't notice knowing that was what he wanted.

"I don't know for sure," Zander hedged. "I just find it a little strange that Brian suddenly has a constant companion, especially given who that companion is."

His cryptic message confused her but she ignored that. She had more important things to talk to him about. "I got the papers you signed back from Ric, I think I got every copy, even if I didn't it doesn't matter, I'm still going to put your name down on her birth certificate. You're my daughter's father, I had no right to try to keep her from you. I don't know why I treated you the way I did, I don't know if I can explain it so it will make sense. All I know was I was desperate to believe in Ric, and because of that I blinded myself to the truth about him, and the truth about the person I was being turned into. Sometimes your just so desperate to believe in something to prove something to yourself and others, you hang on to that person when there's nothing left between you," she sighed painfully. "I'm sorry must sound real hollow from where your sitting."

"I wanted to believe that I could get Emily back, that she would love me again the way she used to, the way I still loved her. Because of that belief I turned into someone I didn't recognize someone who was worse than the person who used to push drugs for Sorel. I know all about blinding yourself to the truth Elizabeth."

"Is there anyway you can stay in town?"

"No," he answered immediately. "Even if I could figure out a way to clear my name, I can't stay in this town, stay near Emily I might turn back into that bastard that spooked you enough that you were willing to keep my baby away from me in the first place."

"I'm so…"

"Don't say it," he got to his feet. "I had to see you one last time. I had to thank you for saving my life. I'm not going to waste it this time."

"Do you have any money?"

"I'm fine," he gave her a cryptic smile.

"Send me a postcard at least once a month, you don't have to sign them just let me know your okay."

She'd received 2 postcards so far, and she'd figured out what his cryptic smile had meant. Not long after he'd left she'd found the trinket he'd left for her and the baby. It was a piece of the treasure everyone had been fighting over. She'd only hesitated a moment before taking it to an old friend. Francis had sold the piece and probably got her more than market value for it, he could be intimidating when he wanted to be. 

The money was financing her new life. Francis had tracked down a nice apartment in a secure building and she'd found the job on her own. She was making it on her own, she wouldn't have to depend on anyone to help her financially that helped keep Ric at bay. Being alone was turning out to be a good thing for her, but that didn't mean she didn't want Jason to wake up. She always had room for friends in her life. 

Smiling softly she moved onto the elevator. For the first time in her life she was on her own and she wasn't afraid. Her hand came to rest on her stomach, and again she smiled as she headed off the elevator towards the door to the street. She wasn't alone, she'd never be alone again. Even when her daughter was grown and moved away, she would always be a part of her.

Stepping outside the hospital she lifted her face to the afternoon sun and felt a gentle breeze on her face. The west wind was warm which surprised her given the time of year. Turning she looked at Jason's window, she'd take that to mean that things were finally changing.

~*~*~

Perspiration coursed down his face and yet he still didn't give up. Had he been trying for minutes or hours? He didn't know, he just knew he wasn't going to quit. Jason's mind was beginning to rebel when he felt it, when he finally felt his finger move.


End file.
